My Mother’s Day Mantra
I embrace everyday how ineffective I feel as a mother. My perception of ineffectiveness gets evoked all the time. Whether it’s because my children perceive me as not being good enough, personally feeling inadequate or me actually not putting myself out there and trying hard enough.
The reason I appreciate my ineffectiveness is because it’s a consistent reliable reminder for me to always try my best, take action based on my parenting values and reinforces that there’s room for me to grow and improve in my relationships with my children.
I encourage their opinions, their differences and their frustrations. I know that intrinsic in that is acceptance that I won’t always be liked, accepted or welcomed by them. It comes along with the territory. How can I not feel ineffective with the constant flow of the good, the bad and the ugly?
I would not change a thing; not even my feelings of ineffectiveness. When I hear those words uttered and have that self-perception, it’s my wake up call to step it up. Sometimes it works in the moment and sometimes I have to be patient to see the fruits of my labor.
The other day I left my home in the morning still frustrated by an incident that happened at work. As I was getting ready at the gym mirror to leave for work, I received a message on a contact sheet from my website. It read, “just would like to say I am a huge fan of yours. i read your blog every day and it is very helpful for me. I would also like to say that your book is very helpful. I don’t understand how you manage 4 kids and still be able to write a book.” As I looked to see who to respond to I discovered it was one of my sons. I smiled ear to ear.
Yes, I can still be ineffective at times and be liked, accepted and welcomed during other moments. I’ll take those anytime and every time.